Doubting religion? There is nothing wrong with you. Take off the Blinders.

Until very recently, I thought there was something wrong with me.  Everyone around me seemed to happily accept the religion they were given with no questions asked.  If anyone besides me ever doubted, I never saw it. It is extremely isolating to be the only one among your family and church friends to question the reality with which we are presented.

I thought the reason I couldn't accept Christianity was because of who I was as a person. I was too curious, too logical, too rebellious, too disobedient.  I often wished I had been born differently. Couldn't I have been given more of a pliable mind? What if I were just a tad more gullible? Maybe then I could be convinced that the Bible is true. That this invisible entity that I couldn't feel, touch, or hear is actually there.

These feelings eventually turned into guilt.  I tearfully admitted to my best friend that I didn't have any faith, but I wished I had some.  I asked her why it was so easy for her, why was it so easy for EVERYONE around me.  

It would be another six years before I figured out the truth.  All along, there had been nothing wrong with me.  

There was something wrong with the wasn't true! Not even a bit of it.

If you find yourself questioning your religion, follow that desire to question.  If your religion is true, then it should hold up to scrutiny.  If your religion can be dismantled by asking some good questions, then there is something wrong with your religion. 


There are over 4,000 religions in the world today, and thousands more created throughout humanity's history.  Any religion should be considered untrue unless it can be proven true.  All religions can't be true, so what are the odds that the one you were born into is actually the true one?  What are the odds that the God of the Bible is the actual God who created the cosmos?  Slim.  Very slim.  Slimmer still, when you take into account the innumerable problems with the theology and with the scriptures.  

So why don't Christian's realize this?  Very few Christians stop and say, "Wait, I should really look hard at this religion that I inherited to see if it actually holds up."

It's because of a few things: societal and familial pressures, indoctrination, and "blinders".  

Societal and Familial Pressure: My entire family is very Christian, so to go against it felt like going against my identity.  There is a fear associated with being an outcast.  Why would we question our religion when all we really want most is to fit in?  Some are threatened with shunning, losing their friends, spouse, or job. It's easier just to conform.

Indoctrination: Those of us raised in Christianity had the stories and theology drilled into our heads from a very young age. Kids are very impressionable. It is extremely difficult, though not impossible, to overcome the programming.  I am convinced that some children are less susceptible to indoctrination (probably me, since I questioned at an early age), while others accept everything and it never gets undone.  I write more about indoctrination here.

Blinders:  Blinders are the result of years of cautionary tales against "doubt".  Blaspheming the holy spirit is the one unforgiveable sin. We are told that non-Christians are unhappy, they have higher rates of this, and that, and so forth.  Atheists are devil-worshippers.  I still remember my dad disparaging atheists when I was young. The cumulative effect of all of this is that we all wear "blinders".  If we see an argument against God on TV, we change the channel. We would never expose ourselves to any view other than our own. We only seek out sources that will confirm our own conclusions.  As my mother said to me when I was first hinting at my deconversion, I was asking "dangerous" questions to the "wrong people".

The good thing is that once these three obstacles are recognized, it is easier to defeat them.  Often, we don't even realize the blinders are there.  If you see the blinders, you can make a conscious choice to take them off. 

Once you take off the blinders, you will start down a path that may be rocky.  It may be treacherous and it will probably be long. There will be times you may want to turn back. Maybe it's easier in the fold.

But just keep thinking about the joy of living a genuine life.  The feeling that you have when you are sitting in the comfortable glow of the actual truth, one that can be supported by evidence. There is no questioning, no guilt, no doubt. You are free to believe what you want to believe, to explore whatever you want to explore, to learn new things, to question your reality.

And you will make the greatest discovery of all: There is nothing wrong with you. You were not bad for questioning. You were smart. You knew that something was wrong, and you followed that thread of truth wherever it led.

That makes you a genuine badass.

You might need some friends along with way. Join us at this private Facebook group for support.  We have all been through it and we can help. 


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